Buddhism As Education

Forgiveness is a change of heart, a radical transformation of our relationship towards people whom we have harmed, towards people whom have harmed us and towards ourselves, away from hatred and revenge; guilt and shame; self-hatred and self-punishing. To forgive is to stop justifying and indulging the emotions of hurt, anger, guilt, shame associated with the incident which evoked pain. When we have forgiven fully, we remember the incident and feel only compassion for ourselves and the other party for all the suffering and pain evoked and expressed in the incident. To forgive is not to brush an incident aside and forget it. Pushing it out of mind is a suppressive measure and the grudge works underground and sabotages our lives in ways of which we are unaware. For instance, it may be that we have been hurt by an unfaithful partner. If we fail to work through hurt towards forgiveness, that hurt stays within us and prevents us from forming a new relationship out of fear of further hurt. It

With Khedup Rinpoche, Khenpo Rinpoche, my mum and brother Khenpo Rinpoche, my mum and my brother With Khenpo Rinpoche, my dad and mum Khenpo Rinpoche with me Today, my family and I had made a courtesy visit to Karma Norbuling Buddhist Centre (KNBC) which is situated at Jalan Rozhan, Alma, Bukit Mertajam. We were greeted by Venerable Lama Khedup Rinpoche (KNBC resident master) and visiting Khenpo Menlha Rinpoche who is from Dolpo Buddha Service Centre, Jorpati-Kathmandu, Nepal. During our visit we exchange views, current Buddhist issues and opinions with both Rinpoches. Khenpo Menlha Rinpoche is due to leave soon for Penang and Sabah. We wish to express our heartfelt thanks and gratefulness to both Khedup Rinpoche and Khenpo Rinpoche for their hospitality and lessons.

Hurting another? What happens when we hurt someone? The reason for wanting to harm someone are many: envy and jealousy; revenge; spite; sheer cruelty. They are so many reasons as there are malevolent intentions. And when we achieve our goal of hurting someone, there arises a satisfaction, a joy in someone's suffering. This is cruelty. This is hard for us to accept because for the most part, we think we act from good motives. We justify and rationalize our behaviour: Eye for an eye; I just wanted to put them in their place and so on. the results is a hardening of the heart and distancing of it from its own emotions making it impervious to another's suffering. But when we empathise with the victim, then we feel shades of shame, guilt and remorse. How should we understand these qualities? Feeling shame We feel shame when our self-esteem is punctured. We lose face. We thought we were good but now we realize we can behave in petty or malicious ways. Our self-image is bruised and we